REALITY BYTES

Megan Hauserman is “that girl”, that you just can’t trust to be real with you. God only knows, Megan has her mind on gold and a heart that yearns for it. Vh1 gave the Ok for Megan Hauserman to have a project wrapped around that killer body of hers. No date is set as yet. No real title for her show has been settled on yet. In fact, no real contestants for Megan’s show have been found yet. But, they better be rich!

Out of all those women that are a part of the Vh1 stable of stars, no one can hold a candle to Megan. She has brains, but only uses them to pretend to be dumb. She also has a body that most guys would die for and she can flirt on cue. Megan has but one flaw, and it’s a big one. Megan Hauserman is an evil person. The glass is either half empty, or half full for most of us. No one is ever completely good, or bad. Yet, Megan’s glass in brimming over with darkness. She may not be completely bad, because Megan does have soft spots for her retarded dog and Brandy C.

Presently, Vh1 and Megan Hauserman are taking applications for contestants for her new reality show. Megan wants to be someone’s “trophy wife”. At least Ms. Hauserman is honest about it. Applicants for Megan’s show can get all of the details and apply through Vh1’s website.

Before you guys jump online and Google Vh1, you better be worth more than a million bucks. Megan will not even throw a drink in your face for anything less.

Knowing Megan, she won’t care what you look like, smell like, what you like to do, or even what your age or politics might be. She only wants to know that you can afford to give her money when she wants it.

Forget everything that you have heard Megan say on the past reality shows she has been in. Her actions have always spoken for her and they speak volumes. Unless you are Brandy C., no one can trust Megan Hauserman. This woman will say whatever she needs to say, in order to get what she wants.

Megan’s new show should be a lot of fun. A bunch of guys that have lots of money that they want to throw at her. Megan should be in reality heaven with this arrangement. You can count on Megan wimping every single one of these contestants out, because Megan really doesn’t like guys. She only likes what they can do for her.

If you are a single male that is worth more than a million bucks, likes to be humiliated, can live with a dog that Megan cares for more than you, enjoys being called pet nicknames like: Worm, Wimpy, Vomit, Little Dickie, etc.; then make tracks to the Vh1 website and put in your application! Maybe you will get lucky and be on the Megan Hauserman show.

Keep your eyes out for “Rock of Love Charm School - Reunion”. This will be airing on Vh1 in a few days. Megan pissed off Sharon Osbourne so bad, that she attacked her, pulling her hair and scratching her. Megan does have a mouth on her.

So, get ready for another mindless series from Vh1, starring Megan Hauserman to premiere sometimes this next year. Needless to say, we will all be taking a big Vh1 bite out of this one!

The City is off to a troubled start already. Poor Whitney Port seems to be caught in the middle of it all. Much like “The Hills”, this spin off, The City follows Whitney Port to the east coast, where she works on the fashion industry; or does she really?

Whitney is supposedly a major player in Diane von Furstenburg’s design business, or is she really a player at all? According to inside sources that the “New York Post” reported yesterday, Whitney Post is not really working and is rarely in the office.

Added to this, MTV’s production crew has slowed work to a crawl at this fashion design company, Whitney is supposed to be a big part of. After all, this whole show is about Whitney Port landing her dream job in New York!

According to the “New York Post”, employees spend more time trying to keep the office looking the same, so MTV can do re-shoots as needed. When MTV tells the employees that they can’t move anything around, this interrupts the real work that the company does, putting the real business of fashion design at a standstill.

Like “The Hills”, it would seem that The City is not going to be a true reality show either. Many insiders that spent a few days in “The Hills” production over the years, claim the jobs aren’t real, the people aren’t real and most of the parties etc. are usually set up by MTV for the sake of entertainment.

Someone needs to invent a word for this new brand of “reality” series that MTV has branded. When most of the events the viewers are watching are scripted for the sake of entertainment, then what happens to the reality?

On January 5, 2009 at 10 PM True Beauty will debut on ABC. Ashton Kutcher and Tyra Banks got together to punk a beauty pageant reality show competition! Four guys and six gals are competing in challenges that relate the their looks. What these contestants do not know is, they are being judged on their character. It’s the inner beauty that is going to count on True Beauty.

Of course, none of these wanna-be models are aware that they are going to be judged on what they are really made of. This tricked out show should be pretty interesting. Judging by a few teaser previews of True Beauty that ABC has been showing, a lot of these contestants are way off the arrogance meter.

The judges of True Beauty are Cheryl Tiegs, Vanessa Minnillo and Nole Marin. They will be critiquing these contestants every single week, based on their character. It’s only at the end of each week, the True Beauty contestant that is eliminated, learns about how they were really being judged on the show.

This is one of the ABC previews of True Beauty that is being aired.

After watching so many reality shows that have contestants most of us love to hate, it’s refreshing to see a show like True Beauty come along. Now we should all get to see instant karma at work.

You do have to wonder if any of these contestants will get the deeper message of it all, when they find out why they were eliminated from True Beauty. Thank you Ashton Kutcher! Hope this show is worth the effort.

On January 4th, we will get to see a glimpse of what happens to those “throw away” teen celebrities; after the fact. It isn’t a pretty sight. Some of us will revel in this display. Others will simply laugh at the whole idea, that these people were even teenagers at one time. Still, others will take note: the world is not a very warm place to those that came before us.

Vh1 is trying to be creative and insightful with this one. “Confessions of a Teen Idol” looks like a good production, with some real pathos. This production looks raw and revealing.

Ever since movies were born, child actors were treated like royalty, until they grew up. It seems even more painful for teen idols that fade into reruns. “Confessions of a Teen Idol” is all about those teen idols that suddenly ran out of work and didn’t know what to do. Some went into hiding, yet most were unprepared and had to face reality. No jobs, no money, menial jobs waiting tables, etc.

“Confessions of a Teen Idol” is a major reality show, giving some of these guys another shot at fame, fortune and the Hollywood treatment. The real nut is, they all must re-learn what the craft and routines are now. Everything is different and nothing stays the same. It’s a real jolt to most of the cast in this series. Trying to regain something they lost; so long ago is not easy to get back on track again.

This is a quick clip of the past Idols that will be in “Confessions of a Teen Idol”.

“Confessions of a Teen Idol” takes some of the better known media idols from “years gone-by” and tries to remodel them for today’s media. These stars all had their lights turned out years ago. Now it’s up to this show to put the sparkle back into them and make them shine once again.

The production team of “Confessions of a Teen Idol” builds them up, teaches them what they need to know, then exposes them all to the right people. It’s almost like watching the tech team on that old series, “The Six Million Dollar Man”, trying to make Steve Austin; be all he can be.

This is not just another Vh1 production. “Confessions of a Teen Idol” makes us squirm. It hits a lot of us in the gut, because many of us know what it’s like to be challenged to do things we feel ill equipped to do anymore. We get to see a few of these guys fall down and have to pick themselves up again.

“Confessions of a Teen Idol” is airing on Jan. 4th. It’s a real bite of reality.This reality series is worth checking out. Forget the hype and teasers you will see, then suspend your judgment. This series could be one of the best reality shows on the cable menu this new year.

Without a doubt, Dr. Drew Pinksy has a mother complex when it comes to his rehab kids. He wants them to be clean and sober, so they can live happier lives. Sometimes it works, other times, it falls flat on it’s celebrity face. It’s great that we get to see all of the highlights on camera. Thank you Vh1 for caring so much!

This past season of “Celebrity Rehab”, we were able to see another flock of stoners walk through the doors of Dr. Drew’s laboratory and graduate on time.

Dr. Drew always wants his patients to go that last step and enter a halfway house, but that is not going to happen to a certain percentage. Every time the graduates announce that they will not be going that “sober living house”, Dr. Drew gets that lump in is throat and looks like he personally got shot down.

The statistics will tell you that, a very few will make it onto the road to sobriety. How many stayed sober from Celebrity Rehab 1 ? I won’t bore you with who’s out on the prowl, again. Shifty, from Celebrity Rehab 1, made a rather bold entrance into this last installment. Shifty wants to stay straight. That’s why he made such a grand re-entry.

Jeff Conaway didn’t make it through the first season. Now, he got booted out of this season of Celebrity Rehab. Sad to say, Jeff Conaway is not going to ever get clean. Dr. Drew loves Jeff and wants to get him clean, but no one can do this for Jeff.

It’s estimated that about half the viewers returned to Celebrity Rehab 2, just to see Conaway again. Jeff does a real good imitation of Jerry Lewis doing, “Hey! Pretty Lady!”. Jeff knows how to cry on cue. He knows how to get all the cameras and hospital staff kicked in to get a spot light shining on him too.

I don’t think anyone saw Jeff Conaway in a more truer light, when Jeff left Celebrity Rehab this season. He looked straight, acted straight and didn’t put on any theatrics for us. We watched Jeff and Vicki go back home and find their stash, still intact.

We got to see the real Jeff Conaway, as he took his Oxy and smiled to the camera, telling Dr. Drew, what he was really all about. Will we ever see Jeff Conaway again? The real question is: Was anyone surprised to see Jeff show up for the next season of Celebrity Rehab? Jeff is good for the ratings!

Hopefully, Dr. Drew won’t let Conaway into the next season of Celebrity Rehab. Jeff does have a few valid issues, but Dr. Drew can’t help Mr. Conaway anymore. Unfortunately, Jeff needs to lose everything he has, before he would even consider staying straight again. This is not likely going to happen again. Jeff likes his painkillers too much, and he is always going to have a very messed up back.

Is Celebrity Rehab a good thing? Of course it is! Most of these people really want to clean up their lives and break their habits. Even though VH1 sticks their cameras in everyone’s face, the patients really want to make changes. Hopefully, this fresh batch is going to make it out there in the real world.

What do Kim Kardashian, Rob Kardashian, Courtney Love and “Bromance” star, Brody Jenner all have in common? They seem to all be tied into the latest media event that started on Christmas eve day! Will this be a celebrity blog war?

Courtney Love posted on her MySpace page that Rob Kardashian punched Courtney’s employee in the face, breaking his nose. Love went on further to write that Rob Kardashian then called her employee a “faggot”. Love posted that there was absolutely no provocation or reason for Kardashian’s attack on this man.

Courtney also conveyed that all her employee was doing was hanging with the “Bromance” star, Brody Jenner outside the Hyde Lounge when this attack occurred. Maybe, Rob Kardashian figured that anyone hanging out with Jenner is now trying to start a “Bromance” with Brody?

Kim Kardashian would have none of this “Courtney Love” nonsense, and posted a reply on her own website.

Kim called Courney’s allegations, totally false. Then went on to imply that, Love’s claims did not make any sense or even follow any train of thought. Courtney’s ramblings made no sense because her writing was that bad. Kim Kardashian wrapped things up, stating that her brother Rob and Jenner did not do anything remotely close to what Courtney Love was claiming.

In the meantime, Courtney Love must have sobered up long enough to go into her blog-space, in an attempt to retract and clear Brody Jenner of having any part of Rob Kardashian’s bullying behavior.